A client and I were discussing the value of falling apart… the very real dis-integration that happens when we are learning to move from a set of habitual behaviors towards making new choices. When we’ve left the relative safety of the known defense and are swimming in unknown waters. It can feel like an utter breakdown; urgent, scary, uncertain.
So I said, ”A friend of mine (well known Gestalt therapist) likes to say, “Breakdown preceded breakthrough.”
My client replied, “Well, a friend of mine likes to say, “I’m having a nervous breakthrough!”
I just LOVE that saying! Having our hearts and minds WIDE OPEN during the periods of uncertainty and change is what helps us land safely on the other side. Openness makes the difference between breakdown and breakthrough.
How do we stay open when it hurts the most?… with love and support. The support of loving friends, a trusted therapist, our community. Most importantly, a place where we can slow down, turn inside, and give ourselves the opportunity to see new choices spontaneously arrive in consciousness. The combination of moving consciously toward our experience in the presence of love and acceptance is what makes the difference between nervous breakdowns or gently breaking through to new possibilities.
Therapy is essentially about freedom. The freedom to be who we truly are. So if you’re feeling like you’re about to fall apart and shatter, move consciously, please reach out for love and support.
With love,
Lucien